Lost and...never found

Aww isn’t that a sweet moment. My boys. He really is the beloved daddy in our home, but he isn’t taking a hiatus at sustaining his Idiot Husband title…

What does a wedding band and house key have in common? The ability to be lost by Idiot Husband…multiple times! Maybe he has an aversion to metal. Or maybe he just enjoys witnessing the gaze of bewilderment in my eyes when he asks me to obtain replacements of these items.

The key request always starts off the same:
“How many keys did you get made last time?”‘
2’ (I like even numbers)
“Only 2, not several?”
‘No, only 2. What have you done with them?’
“I don’t know, that is why I need you to make more keys”

So enlightening. Why does he continue to take the house key off of his keychain? These are questions I cannot worry my pretty little head about.

The ring story/request can vary…but it always starts off with water and ends with him using a metal detector. The latest one goes like so:

“Did you see me wearing my ring when I was on the roof?”
‘Um, no. It was raining and you were cleaning the gutters on a metal ladder so I decided to stay inside so the kids wouldn’t see their daddy become a human lightening rod.’
“Well I think I had it on when I got off the roof and it maybe came off when I was using the water hose.”
‘Actually dear, I did witness your impressive dismount from the roof onto the fence, but checking to see if you were in one piece distracted me from checking your ring finger specifically.’

The next few days involved a treasure hunt with a metal detector, which delighted the boy and girl, but revealed no wedding band. He is now on #3…in 7 years. Not a good ratio Idiot Husband.

Sick and Stupid

Sick babies, sick mommy, mommy’s birthday, new pets, new child care, and the usual excuses are the latest excuses for no blogging. Let me start with sick babies (3 weeks ago). I get a call at work from a frantic daddy that the boy has thrown up several times and there is no where left to sit in the house. Apparently the boy chose the furniture to get sick on. Even though he doesn’t directly ask, I know this is my cue to leave the office. I arrive home to a boy with a fever, but no more upset tummy and a teething girl who wants to play. This I expected. I did not expect all of the cushions from my couch and chair in the driveway, along with the cushion covers draped across my laundry drying rack. This rack is meant for sweaters. In my house. Not in the front lawn to display my living room upholstery. Does the sun not shine in our backyard oh Idiot Husband? I am still awaiting the HOA reprimand…
The photo is after I re-dressed my furniture, but not the kids. Sick babies are happiest in pull-ups and diapers :)

Every Room Should Have a Fridge

The boy and I went on a short shopping trip Saturday morning. We headed out to buy another jogging stroller…and bought a new fridge instead. Don’t ask. My newest addition was delivered the next day and that is how Sunday turned into renovate the house day. The old fridge is not broken, I’m just sick of the bottom freezer drawer. So we plan to keep it in the garage for extra storage space. The garage however needs extra storage space. One guest room makeover and hauled away trailer full of garage treasures later, there is a site designated for the old fridge. Have you asked yourself where the fridge is currently dwelling? In my dining room! Because this is where Idiot Husband parked it so to keep it plugged in while we were rearranging. This made sense. Today, three days later, it does not. This better not turn into the Christmas Tree stand off of 2007. That fake tree was up until Easter. This fridge better not see a holiday. Especially since the next one isn’t until September. Lord help him.

Fun with knots...

Really? Does this book title captivate you? Make you want to learn all about knots and waste your precious spare time tying them? If you answered no to these intriguing questions, you are not Idiot Husband. We made a trip to Barnes and Noble Sunday, and while I was checking out, he runs up all excited b/c he found this fascinating book that teaches you how to tie a useless amount of knots. And to make it more exciting-it was on the clearance rack! Wow, imagine that? What luck to have found this enthralling book, and on sale as a bonus. Idiot Husband was well on his way to a perfect Sunday. So as a basket of laundry lay at his feet to fold, a garage called his name for a clean up, a backyard anticipated a weeding, a shower head waited to be replaced, and trashcans expected to be placed at the curb…he sat. With this book. And two pieces of rope. Beaming, and occasionally urging me to see just how cool his latest accomplished knot was.
What was I doing during his retreat into the world of knots ? Wiping noses, cooking dinner. preparing next day lunches and bags, washing clothes, playing kitchen, reading the Boo Boo book, playing horsey (I, being the horsey), downloading pictures, updating laptop b/c too many pictures, singing ABC’s and Twinkle Twinkle, and occasionally pausing to see a cool knot. God love em.