Lost and...never found

Aww isn’t that a sweet moment. My boys. He really is the beloved daddy in our home, but he isn’t taking a hiatus at sustaining his Idiot Husband title…

What does a wedding band and house key have in common? The ability to be lost by Idiot Husband…multiple times! Maybe he has an aversion to metal. Or maybe he just enjoys witnessing the gaze of bewilderment in my eyes when he asks me to obtain replacements of these items.

The key request always starts off the same:
“How many keys did you get made last time?”‘
2’ (I like even numbers)
“Only 2, not several?”
‘No, only 2. What have you done with them?’
“I don’t know, that is why I need you to make more keys”

So enlightening. Why does he continue to take the house key off of his keychain? These are questions I cannot worry my pretty little head about.

The ring story/request can vary…but it always starts off with water and ends with him using a metal detector. The latest one goes like so:

“Did you see me wearing my ring when I was on the roof?”
‘Um, no. It was raining and you were cleaning the gutters on a metal ladder so I decided to stay inside so the kids wouldn’t see their daddy become a human lightening rod.’
“Well I think I had it on when I got off the roof and it maybe came off when I was using the water hose.”
‘Actually dear, I did witness your impressive dismount from the roof onto the fence, but checking to see if you were in one piece distracted me from checking your ring finger specifically.’

The next few days involved a treasure hunt with a metal detector, which delighted the boy and girl, but revealed no wedding band. He is now on #3…in 7 years. Not a good ratio Idiot Husband.